The Longest Night

 **Due to my lack of internet access for the past day and a half, this post is about a day and a half late. just pretend like i posted it a day and a half ago. Thanks for your cooperation**

The only way i can describe my last "day" is travel marathon. I took off from Baltimore at 7:30 am ET, and touched down in Bankok at 2:30 am Local Time, 2:30 pm ET. So in a tidy 31 hours I got from one side of the world to the other. Welcome to the future everyone.
So first things first: Chicago. Not impressed O'Hare International, not impressed. Not only did my flight get delayed multiple times, so that our 1:15 flight didn’t depart until about 6, but during the 9 or so hours i spent in the airport, i saw about 9 electrical outlets, 0 of which were convenient. Chicago is a cool city, but their major international airport seriously needs to step their game up. The one great part of being in that airport was being greeted by this glorious sight 90 minutes into my layover:

So with Liebler and I hand in hand, we wait. For hours. But eventually our flight takes off, and we bid our all too eager goodbyes to Chicago. Our flight path to Tokyo took us through Canada, over the Alaskan and Russian coasts, and down into Japan. Here's what made that “night" the longest night of my life: The sun set over Chicago around 6:30 CT, and Liebler and I did not see the sun again until 8 am Local Time this morning. That adds up to about 24 hours of darkness, the longest night of my life by a very wide margin.

The 13 hour flight from the US to the Land of the Rising Sun was not as soul-crushingly long as I expected. We watched movies, listened to music, slept a little, and got fed 3 separate times. Also we go these, for free:

The layover in Tokyo was about 15 minutes, due to our lengthy, electrically inconvenient delay in Chicago. I think in most cases we would've just been screwed, but because there were so many people on our flight that were connecting on to Bangkok as well, they held that flight up too. So we walked off our plane, down a couple hallways, were directed to another gate, and boarded, in what must have been the most efficient connection of my life. The Japanese are known for their efficiency. Right?

The final leg to Bangkok was similarly painless, except for choosing to watch the movie “Due Date” with Robert Downey Jr. and Zach Galifianakis. Don’t watch it. I really like both of those actors, but I probably laughed out loud twice. I don’t know how two people that are so funny could end up making a movie that is so unfunny. But aside from the bad movie, the flight was fairly uneventful and involved a good bit of sleeping.
When we stepped off the plane in Bangkok we walked into a wall of warm, humid air, and that’s how I knew it was real, we were on the other side of the world (though I guess we could’ve just been in Florida…). We grabbed our bags from baggage claim, exchanged some dollars for Thai Baht, and found a taxi. America really needs to step up its taxi game, Thailand is clearly miles ahead:

The cabby drove fast and on the left side of the road, all of which was appreciated because we just wanted to get to our guesthouse and lay down, and in Thailand they all drive on the wrong side of the road like they do in England. Wacky.

When we arrived at the guesthouse, we had to wake up the proprietor to get our keys, which we felt bad for but he insisted was not a problem (despite the fact that he was wearing nothing but a pair of rather short nylon soccer shorts). We settled in, walked down to the local 7-11, of which there are more per square acre in Bangkok than there are Starbucks in New York City. We walked back to the room, heard a few dogs arguing in a nearby alley, figured out how the bathrooms in Thailand work, and finally slept in an actual bed.

The marathon was finally over, and we are finally in Thailand.